Semi Crunchy, Always Extra

I saw something floating around facebook groups that asked people to reveal their very first social media screen name such as for AOL Instant Messenger. Now, if you are old enough to remember AOL Instant Messenger, then you were probably chatting with people using dial up internet… which you got for free from the AOL CD-ROMs at blockbuster. Both of these things are now a dead, so I guess that shows us how far we’ve come in social media and technology? Maybe.

We’re going way back to when I first gained access to the Internet. I was in middle school, in my early teens, and the thing to do was to chat with your friends on AOL instant messenger. This required you to have a screen name. So, before we had Instagram feeds with all the pretty squares or Facebook profiles with all the nice pictures in the little bio that you can write about yourself, we had one single line – our screen name – to capture someone’s attention, and of course get them to start up a conversation with us.

“A/S/L?”

🙂

At that time, I thought I was so savvy. Naturally, that meant that I would do what I thought was the cool thing to do. Create a website! This is way back when you had to know HTML or know somebody who did HTML to pay to do it for you.

So, I ordered HTML for dummies. Actually, no. I went to Borders (for youngins, the book and CD store).

I created a website, and posted some content. I thought I was extra tech savvy when I created a contact form where people could leave comments on my webpage – like the rarely utilized comment section of blogs nowadays.

This is where it turns. This is where I encounter my very first Internet asshole.

This guy, who is Vietnamese, in his 20’s ::Too young for you, bro!:: Is sending me hate messages because I’m a young Vietnamese female “sellout” who dyes her hair… trying to bleach out her heritage. 🙄 He goes on to make even more nasty comments, picking apart everything, down to who I date and the color of their skin.

Sounds like someone is a little salty that the underage girl he’s trying to make advances at online might not be interested in him. Hmmm…

Totally naive to how trolls behind their keyboard are, I took offense to this and responded, getting into a stupid online argument with the guy.

Now, as an adult female in 2019… this is what I know:

• The choice to change your hair, wear makeup (or not), has no bearing on your ethnic identity.
• These choices have no bearing on your gender identity either.
• No one 👏🏼 no man 👏🏼 tells a woman how she should look.
• Don’t waste your breath on internet trolls! BYE!

Cue the montage of fun unnatural hair colors… haha! I had to liven it up a bit!

Lastly, I’ll leave you with a revised version of something else I saw floating around facebook.

If she uses a Snapchat filter every time she takes a picture, because it makes her feel pretty. Let her do it.

If she smooths out every wrinkle on her face/body before she posts the picture. Let her do it.

If she wears the same kind of shirt everyday because that’s the one she feels comfortable in. Let her do it.

If she gets dolled up with makeup and lashes everyday and wants to post her picture for attention, let her do it.

If she takes gym selfies to track her progress every day. Let her do it.

If she poses the same way in every picture because she likes that angle of her body the best. LET HER DO IT.

We live in a society where it’s hard to feel good enough. Yet I see women every day posting negative statuses like “stop doing…. yadayada”

Why would you ever want her to stop doing something what makes her feel good?

The truth is, it’s shouldn’t matter to you! Her happiness is HERS not yours.

If it makes her feel pretty…..even for a split second, if it makes her feel good about herself…..

Let her do it.

I agree with the sentiment- Her happiness is HERS, not yours.

However, we do not get to “let her” it was always her choice.

Juuuuust kidding – I have one more thing to add. I guess as a woman of 2019, I have a lot to say and share.

If you haven’t seen this video from Kristina Kizmic on facebook it’s a must watch.

https://www.facebook.com/112060638857663/posts/2198287616901611/