Semi Crunchy, Always Extra

Our first Halloween with James, he had just turned 3 months old so we stayed in and enjoyed candy at home. Where we live, we don’t get any trick-or-treaters so it was a quiet night. The following year, he was a freshly minted “toddler” over a year old and walking. We decided this would be his first “real” Halloween. His walk at 15 months old was more of a wander,  still very zigzaggy with no real destination in mind so I wore him in a soft structured baby carrier with a doggy costume pinned over it. #momhack! He would be a pumpkin and go trick-or-treating with his best friend Sabatino. We carried the kiddos and walked door to door collecting candy that the homeowners knew would be consumed by the moms, but the boys looked adorable so people were happy to humor us. 

Fast forward to this Halloween. James is now a terrible two and we just welcomed a new addition to the family. Recently, in an act of desperation to keep my tot entertained, while I fed, burped and rocked our days-old newborn Maya, I caved and paid $14.99 to Amazon instant video to buy Toy Story. He absolutely loved it and squealed gleefully throughout the movie. So, three days before Halloween with no costume ideas pinned on Pinterest, we ordered a Woody costume online. Thanks Amazon Prime! 

The morning of Halloween, I thought it would be a good idea to get James dressed in Woody garb and go for a walk. I showed him the costume inside its package and his eyes lit up. He will be so excited to be Woody, I thought. I started to slip him into the costume and he kicked his legs away, expressing zero interest in wearing the silly polyester onesie getup. Fair enough. 

That evening, I thought maybe I’d cut the denim print bottom off of the costume and perhaps he would be more comfortable in his own jeans and just wear the top of the costume. Genius idea right? I was so wrong. I slipped the costume over his head and he readily stuck his arm through the first armhole and then as he stuck the second arm through, he looked down at the attached foam gun holster, vest and big belt buckle, he absolutely lost his shit. (Why is cursing necessary here? Because I do, and this was a real life moment.) He instantly screamed at the top of his lungs, as if the costume was made of molten lava. This was no regular tantrum. He was absolutely terrified, sobbing and inconsolable. In that moment I felt so awful for my baby, wondered if he may have a sensory processing disorder (thanks to some mom site article from early that morning), and I wish I had done everything differently. 

We ended up still going out trick or treating with his friends after slapping together a last minute greaser costume from his regular wardrobe. I thought about not going out at all. The whole thing just felt terrible, and by this point we would be late meeting up with his friends. However, I knew he’d love trick or treating and didn’t want to take that experience away from him so we gave it a go. We were late, and his costume wasn’t really a costume, but he ended up having a blast! 

Now, in hindsight and high on his sugar stash, I know what I’ll do differently next year in order to avoid the traumatic experience he had. Was it just a toddler tantrum? Displaced adverse reaction to a new sibling? SPD? I don’t know. I’m not here to diagnose my kid. I’m just a mom doing the best I can, and like many other moms, I’m just winging it. 

Here are my takeaways:

• Talk to your child in advance about choosing a costume. 
• Visit the store and let them see, touch and choose the costume. Or work together to craft a costume out of materials he or she will be comfortable wearing. 
• Let them try on the costume at home, and be comfortable wearing or carrying any accessories it comes with. 
• If necessary, let your child wear their own clothes underneath in case they become uncomfortable or don’t like walking around dressed up anymore. 
• Let them wear the costume out before Halloween if they choose to. I’m sure tots love the attention they get from everyone who finds a costumed kid before Halloween absolutely adorable!